Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Growing Up

It's almost comical to me how much my eldest wants to grow up. Today for instance, she is carrying around an old cell phone that was discarded when Rohn got his Treo years ago. She snatched that thing right up when I found it yesterday after digging through a box I haven't touched since we moved 7 years ago (yes, I am THAT kind of "out of sight, out of mind" person). And she's talking on the phone to someone very important, and is checking her calendar often. Totally cracking me up. Last year, she went the whole year comparing everything to "when I'm 33...", because of course, I was 33 and it was very cool to be 33.

Makes me think about when I was "little", and when I was in college but still living at home. Oh the things I was going to do when I grew up, when I left home:

  • I was NEVER going to take naps!
  • I would eat dessert as a meal, and drink out of the milk carton.
  • Play my music as loudly as I wished...and sing along at the top of my lungs.
  • Sleep in, sleep in, sleep in as long as I wanted.
  • Stay out past curfew...I mean, who imposes a 10pm curfew on their daughter??
  • I was going to leave the house without telling anyone where I was going, who I'd be with, and when I'd be getting back.
  • I would wear JEANS at any random time I chose to any locale I thought I just might want to wear them. AHA! (I know, this does not sound crazy to anyone else, but you'd have to have my same growing up background to understand, I suppose)
So now I am grown up. I mean, I'm thirty-something, live in a separate town from my parents (separate state!), have a mortgage, 2 kids, and I'm in charge of a ministry at church. I think all those things together might say I've reached grown-up-dom. Here's what I've checked off my list of being a grown up:
  • I LOVE naps, oh my goodness I wish I could get one everyday. And now I'm on the fighting end to make the Littles lay down and rest each day. What??
  • I eat dessert as a meal, chocolate as a meal, and coffee as a meal. And at one time I did drink straight out of the milk carton...b/c I could...but not anymore.
  • When driving the Swagger Wagon, everyone wants to talk to Mama, so the music has to be at a reasonable level. When at home managing the everything all day, music stays at a reasonable level. But, when I'm out on my own, I end up calling someone so I can speak to them uninterrupted...and you know what? I don't so much blare the music at all. That's sad.
  • Sleep in? What is that? Ever since these little alarm clocks entered my house, sleeping in has been a dream of the past...or the future...but definitely not the present. HA! That would be a present!
  • Curfew...I love to be home at 10pm...no, 9pm. Because then the babysitter has done all the work of getting the girls in bed, and then I just get to sit around in my pj's and watch whatever DVR I want to catch up on, and it's quiet. New rule at the Gibsons...try never to pay a sitter when the kids are sleeping. Good one, right?
  • Not telling anyone where I'm going...yea, not so much. When I leave I practically have to leave notes all over, make sure the sitter has my number, assure the girls I'll be right back to kiss them or cuddle them before bed, tell them where we're going and how important it is to be alone with Daddy, give a run down to the sitter, give a time we'll be getting home, check in while we're gone. So much for anonymity.
  • Jeans. Yes...I get to do this one daily. I have my stay-at-home-play-with-the-girls jeans, my date jeans, my going-to-town jeans (you know, the big city! Sioux Falls!), my work jeans. I love them. I live in them. I do believe I could use a few more pair. But to be honest, I love and adore dressing up. High heels. Lacy or opaque tights. Skirts & dresses that flounce above my knee. I now wear jeans everyday and I miss what it feels like to get prettied up. I wear dresses to church even though no one "expects" me to do it. I just love dressing up. I know, I'm weird. Love me anyway ;o)
All of that to bring me back to what I was trying to point out. We spend 1/2 our lives waiting to do our own thing, and then we get to our thirties and discover that we don't ever really get to do our own thing. We had it so easy when we were young...we just never knew it! I so want to instill in my girls a desire to just enjoy life where you're at. The next chapter will come barreling upon you when you least expect it, and then you'll never be able to go back. That chapter will be closed...but a new unwritten one will be in front of you. 

I think I should take my own advice. The jeans were definitely worth the wait though.

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Holding On

Because some days it's all I feel I can do. And lately, I feel it more than ever...which isn't how it should be at all. I should be holding on with all I have all the time. Circumstances can never determine who I view God to be. But, these are the times that I see just how fleeting everything else in life is. There IS nothing to do, but hold on to the only Truth that never changes.